Most interesting dream this week, I was in some kind of war game. However, I think my brain got all confused and wasn't sure whether it was the kind where it happens in real life, but the guns are nonlethal, or whether it happens on a computer/console and they are. I don't think most airsoft scenarios feature real helicopters you can call in for backup.
First of all, happy Easter and happy belated Passover, Good Friday, etc.
Second, I know I teased you last week by saying that I was busy, but more details would follow about what was going on.
Essentially, I have awesome timing. By which I mean I have terrible timing. It so happens that last week, right before Palm Sunday, I came out as an atheist. Handling people's reactions is what has been keeping me busy (and somewhat stressed) since then.
For one thing, and I feel horrid saying this, but I'm starting to get annoyed when my Christian friends talk to me. I would like for them to be curious/supportive, but the most I can get out of them is an argument. Debate is fun and engaging and all that, but it's just a wee bit insulting when they bring out the same arguments I researched in making my decision. There's an implication that I became an atheist due to bad information or incomplete information, which would be quite idiotic on my part. I would have to be thoroughly insane to stop believing in God on a whim -- risking eternal damnation on scant evidence is beyond suicidal.
The reason I feel horrid about saying this, though, is because it's exactly how I would have responded before. I feel guilty for getting frustrated at them, you see, because they're exactly how I was, and I can still put myself in their shoes.
For another thing, it's surprisingly lonely from where I sit. My family, friends, most of the people I spend time with are all Evangelical Christians, and suddenly I have so little in common with them. It's no wonder, now, why some people hide, just keep going to church with a smile. I have revealed the change to some, but there are many, many more to go and I don't know what their reactions will be or how bad their reactions will be. I do know that it will likely fundamentally change my relationships with them, and I fear it will not be for the better.
However, I have to be honest, and I would rather be honest sooner than later. I will wait until the Easter frenzy has died down a bit to tell everyone else, though.
Reality check. In short, that's why I didn't write a post last week.
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Otherwise, poetry, random exclamations, and opinionated diatribe all welcome.