Yesterday I used my famed ability at overkill and drank 5 glasses of milk at dinner. I had more of a dream than the night before, but that could be because I slept in. On the flip side, I was horridly uncomfortable. Have I mentioned that I think I might be partially lactose intolerant? Now I have.
Seems like people talk a whole lot about "life's little pleasures", but completely ignore the fact that life having little pleasures means that it also must have little depressions. There is no task quite so sublimely despondent as eating peas with a fork. There you sit, looking at all these beautiful, smooth, round peas, so perfect. You give a genial scoop, trying to manuever the utensil in such a way that the peas roll uneventfully onto it. Indeed, after a little tussle, the orbs rest on the space between the tines, and you begin to lift the fork to your mouth. Cue loss of peas. Again you try, glancing furtively around at the other people at the table, hoping you don't look as silly as you suspect. This attempt is once more futile. After a few repeats of this action, you give up and try to squash the pea in between the tines, carefully, hoping that its alarming bulging is temporary. After all, the pea is so pretty and unbroken, and you've done all this hard work keeping it that way! But the rebellious pea pops out on the other side of the tines, decidedly untrapped, and you're back to square one.
This process continues, with countless variations, contrivances, and thoughts of cunning. At the end, the pea has to burst, either by blowing up when pressed between the tines of the fork, or because you admit defeat and finally stab it.
And then there is that acute feeling of sadness as the pea deflates...
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After you were kind enough to post a comment on my blog, I decided to follow up and find myself here - giggling with glee. :-)
ReplyDeleteYour obsevations on the process (no pun intended) of eating peas is alarmingly similar to my own experiences - minus any despondent feeling. I am sure you are hiding a certain love for the playful little fellows.
An American comedian (George Carling) once made a comment about peas, and, like him; I too realised I was finally an adult when I could sit down and eat a whole plate of peas as a meal and not get told off. :-)
I'm glad you liked it! I certainly enjoy your blog, and it's nice to know that I may have returned the favor (though I still think that drawing a chain link fence is much harder than writing about the depressing task of eating peas with a fork).
ReplyDeleteI do rather like peas. ;)