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-Newsweek quote: "What Would Winston Do?"-

No certain memories from my dreams last night, except for something about hair. Which is a pity, since it would be so fun to pelt someone with nuts again. ;P

I sit here typing after being speared to within an inch of my life at the hospital. No, don't worry, it was just a regular old checkup, but with that checkup came a good deal of... well, pokes.

In the order of appearance:

1. A tetanus booster on my left arm. Didn't hurt too much -- except that these always hurt like the dickens the day after you get them, so my hopes are not high.
2. A chickenpox booster, also on my left arm. I managed to avoid the pox for my entire childhood, and intend to continue doing so. My father, as it happens, got it in college, and he was miserable -- supposedly it gets worse with age. This particular puncture has protested the most so far.
3. Switching to my right arm, a meningitis shot. Recommended, but not required by the hospital... I figured I'd do it anyway, because meningitis is kind of nasty. Vaccine feels like it's bathed in some sort of scathing fluid, which burned my muscles quite ferociously on the way in, but hasn't really hurt since.
4. A tuberculosis test on my right forearm. Administered by needle, forms a loathsome pustulely white bump that has by now gone down. I'm fairly certain I don't have TB, so that should be the worst of it -- if I do have it, the spot will become pink, inflamed, and itchy within 48 hours.
5. Then a hike to the lab. Since at this point I knew what was coming next, I, ahem, got severely dizzy in the waiting room. Was revived by putting my head between my knees and sipping a can of apple juice.
6. The urine test. Not painful (for which I am eternally grateful), but a tad messy and difficult to collect. The just-consumed apple juice was helpful here.
7. And, finally, the big momma: a blood draw. However, they're actually correct when they say that it doesn't hurt as much as shots (of course, I thought they were just being reassuring at the time). The most painful part is really the tourniquet they apply above the site, and that isn't too bad -- it merely sits there squeezing one's arm for a while. Had a can of grape juice afterwards, which I don't even like. But I did not particularly care at that point.

On the plus side, the rest of the appointment was enjoyable. Especially since it occurred BEFORE all the prickings and pokings. Notably, the blood pressure cuff was much less uncomfortable (not to mention less error-prone) than the one at the grocery store.

Needless (or Needles?) to say, I am not feeling altogether charitable toward Edward Jenner right now.

Reality check. Removing the band-aids and cotton hurt, too.